So this is random, but I have given it some thought, and instead of journaling about it, I figure it's easier to type it out.
So, about 2 years ago, maybe 3, I went out to visit Alex in Utah. While I was out there, I remember reading an article out of the BYU school newspaper about Twilight. The subject title was EMOTIONAL PORN.
I remember reading it, showing it to A, and laughing at how ridiculous it was that someone would be such a hater to write negative about my then fav books.
Well..on Sunday, I watched the 3 twilight movies again with my roomies, and now I have a total different perspective on it.
Recently I have been focused on Jesus, and feel like recently I have matured in my spirituality... through seeking him and focusing on what he has for my life.
It's through this search that I have begun realizing what is most important in my life. and how different relationships play out in that equation.
The most important relationship I have is with my heavenly father and his son Jesus Christ. Above all things, this is the epicenter of my focus..
From that love, I am able to then, if God so chooses to bless me, have a romantic relationship that can lead to marriage. but it's just that. A blessing.
I was not MADE for my husband. I was made to glorify God. I was made to be in union with him. And yes, marriage is a blessing from God...but like I just said... it's just that, a blessing.
So anyways...when watching Twilight..I saw it differently this time.
Bella cannot LIVE without Edward...and Edward find NO PURPOSE without Bella.
I used to find this so romantic and remember wanting that feeling so badly, and that love.
Now, I just think it's stupid, and gives girls an unrealistic view of what Love is. If you place your worth in your relationship, you will be disappointed..It's not an if, it's a when. People aren't perfect, and neither is love. And you are never GUARANTEED that your significant will be around, alive, or faithful...
But you can always count on your father in heaven!
I'm not saying this to be negative nancy about love or about marriage, because I'm not negative about it! I want it, believe me! I want a pretty love story with a handsome man who sweeps me off my feet and we live happily ever after...
My point however is, if that DOESNT happen...I will be okay. Because I don't live for the blessings I receive. I live for the one who does the blessing.
Holla Ballas
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